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Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Echoes of the Spirit


I must extend an apology for my missed post yesterday. Work has sped up just enough that it is difficult to keep a train of thought going as other things continue to take precedence.

I ended my last blog with reference to the jaded worshiper. It was not necesarrily the topic of the blog, but it is truly how I have been feeling for ahwile. My heart and spirit long after God, but my flesh feels so tired and weak. Cynicism and frustration often take their toll. Sunday night we gathered for Africa prayer watch. It was the first in over a month and to be honest Chris and I both felt less than enthused. What had been started to bring like minded people together to intercede on behalf of Africa had dwindled down to about six of us who were faithful on a regular basis. This was disappointing as so many people have gone on mission trips with my dad to Africa, and so many others had good intentions to come. Never the less here were were almost two years into it and the six of us labor away sometimes feeling like our prayers have accomplished little. As we launched into worship my heart felt so distant so blah.
We moved into a song called Jesus Be the Center and I felt the Spirit rise up inside of me. A line in the song says "Be the wind in theses sails." It was a perfect analogy for where I saw myself. Sometimes we have an idea of where we are going, but we have no idea how to get there. Sometimes our arms are tired from rowing with no direction. Sometimes we are not even sure where we are going anymore, but with Jesus as the wind in our sails were are guided and moved by the Spirit of the living God.

What can I pray? How do I pray? I have looked all around seeing godly men grow weary and men, once perceived as righteouss leaders, fall. It has become easier and easier to become isolated and disenchanted in the mass throngs of Christian culture that so often disappoint, but there is hope.
Romans 8:26-27
26In the same way the Spirit also helps our weakness; for we do not know how to pray as we should, but the Spirit Himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words;
27and He who searches the hearts knows what the mind of the Spirit is, because He intercedes for the saints according to the will of God.

In my darkest place and greatest weakness, the Spirit is interceding on my behald as well as yours. I felt something leap inside of me as I read such a passionate scripture. We are not lost or abandoned. The Spirit is intereceding, groaning on our behalf. Our hearts are being searched and purged according to the will of God.
Even in my dark, quiet hiding place, I am not alone. Even when I can do little, but cry out I hear the soft echo of the Spirit helping me in my weakness once more.